


Tell Me Your Story

by aot_simp



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Swearing, Trust, Trust Issues, eruri - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 10:00:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29981154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aot_simp/pseuds/aot_simp
Summary: Erwin realizes his feelings for Levi and the danger surrounding them. Levi interrupts him and a social misstep leads them into a conversation about their pasts. Possible season 3 spoilers.
Relationships: Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith
Kudos: 41





	Tell Me Your Story

For one of the first times since childhood Erwin truly felt out of control, and he was not in the least bit surprised that the rogue-turned-soldier was the one who caused it. The man had torn through the new Commander’s life like a tornado, and Erwin began to realize that taking the man into the Survey Corps was dangerous in all the ways no one had foreseen. Of course, he kept his fantasies to himself, especially since Levi was his subordinate. Any relations between them would be highly inappropriate, although Erwin realized they had crossed that line a long time ago. Not unlike Levi, the blond had a strong distaste for authority and the status quo, that’s what drew them to the Survey Corps to begin with. He knew Levi, with his strength and skill, would more than likely survive anything the titans threw at them. He, however, did not know how much longer he had.

Regardless of the raven’s feelings on the issue, they could not afford to get closer, leaving Erwin in quite the dilemma for multiple reasons. First and foremost, he knew he certainly had less than professional and more than platonic feelings for Levi, and Levi seemed to reciprocate them to some extent. From what Erwin could decipher, Levi had definite feelings of respect and trust towards him, and enough warmth that Erwin knew the raven would be pained if Erwin did not make it back. From this alone there arose a variety of issues, especially that Erwin knew his sacrifice might be necessary, but could have detrimental effects on Levi, and because of Levi he was now hesitant to give up his life for the cause he would have so willingly sacrificed it for only a year before.

Just thinking about it gave him chills now. Rather than his own death, he feared Levi lying alone in his quarters. He remembered the raven’s screams following the deaths of his friends, Isabelle and Farlan, and how that pain only snowballed on top of the pain of his past. The sleepless nights they both had without each other. Levi’s world crashing down on him all over again. He knew and trusted that Levi could remain as efficient and skilled a soldier as ever, and he knew no one else in the Survey Corps would see it, but Erwin knew it would be there, and that pained him enough to make him hesitate. 

The blond leaned on his desk and pinched the bridge of his nose. What a mess he managed to get himself into.

“What’s got you looking so constipated?” a familiar drawl sounded at the door to his quarters, for once in broad daylight. Erwin chuckled, but it was fairly mirthless given his current thoughts.

“I thought I asked you to knock,  _ Captain,”  _ the blond emphasized the last word as he turned in his chair to remind the smaller man of his recent promotion. Levi, however, was clearly not amused. He was leaning against the doorway, arms folded over his chest, with an eyebrow raised. Erwin sighed and waved for Levi to come in. He complied, and shut the door behind him.

With Levi’s skill it was no surprise he moved up the ranks rather quickly, and the new rank essentially made him Erwin’s right-hand man, next to Hanji and Mike. Erwin had to admit, they were quite the team, and the future was looking rather optimistic, at least in the planning phase. Reality would be a different story, as per usual.

“What is it, eyebrows? I could hear your constipated thinking from the other end of the castle.” Erwin huffed at the nickname and he didn’t miss the barely-there smirk playing on Levi’s lips.

“Nothing, Levi, just business as usual.”

“Yeah, right,” the smaller man rolled his eyes. “You’ve been stiffer than usual. It’s like you have a tree jammed up your ass,” he added, standing behind Erwin and jamming his finger at the blond’s shoulder. For his bluntness, Levi could be quite perceptive. Annoyingly so.

“Is this your attempt at flirting? Because it’s not working,” the blond remarked. Levi sputtered and his face turned bright red.

“Fuck off,” he shot back, leaning back away from the chair.

“How charming. You know you could get in serious trouble for speaking to your Commander in such a way,” the blond pointed out teasingly, not wanting the other man to leave, but also not sure why he came over in the first place.

“When this door is shut, you’re not my superior anymore,” Levi stated, tapping the door to Erwin’s quarters with the knuckle of his index finger.

“Wait, Levi-” Erwin started, hearing footsteps and thinking the raven was about to leave. He was cut off by the feeling of two hands on his shoulders and fingers digging into the tight, tender muscle. Erwin flinched and grit his teeth. Fuck, that hurt.

“Damn, it’s worse than it looks,” Levi muttered under his breath.

“What are you doing!?” Erwin asked, dumbfounded. They did not touch during the day, the only contact they had was whatever happened when they were both asleep. That’s it. And now suddenly Levi was initiating contact.

“Consider it a favor.”

“It’s the middle of the day!”

“You need it!” Levi spat back. “You’ll give your dumb ass a migraine like this.” Erwin couldn’t argue about that. He already felt one creeping up the back of his neck.

“You really don’t understand professional boundaries, do you?” Erwin chuckled, dismayed and amused at the same time.

“Where I come from, this is tame as far as “professional” is concerned,” the smaller man quipped. Erwin’s eyes widened and he swallowed hard, the implication of these words crystal clear. Levi’s fingers froze in place and dug into Erwin’s shoulders with a white-knuckled grip that reminded the blond of the dreams he kept having. He slowly released his grip on the blond’s shoulders and backed away. 

“I should go…”

“Wait, Levi,” Erwin turned around and grabbed the smaller man’s wrist. Levi’s eyes widened and all the color left his face. His brows furrowed and something in him just seemed to shatter as the blond registered the look of betrayal and hatred in his eyes. “No, no, Levi, it’s okay,” he tried to assure the raven quietly. Slowly he let go of the smaller man’s wrist, not wanting him to run, but he figured he probably shouldn’t be touching him at the moment. He held out his hands in a gesture of surrender and pushed his chair back to try and appease him.

“Nothing is going to happen, it’s okay. I just want to talk to you,” Erwin assured him.

“About what? You won’t even be honest with me,” the ice in his tone cut Erwin as if Levi had pulled a knife on him. “It’s been  _ years, _ damnit. And you already knew more about me in the first week than I do about you now.” It was true. They had become quite good friends in that time, to a point where they joked with one another, ranks aside. Erwin sighed in defeat.

“You don’t have to tell me anything, okay? But I will tell you about my past. Sound fair?” Levi sighed and seemed to relax a little at this.

“Fine,” he huffed, crossing his arms back over his chest.

“Please, sit,” the blond gestured back towards the bed. Levi complied, his arms remaining crossed, and his legs shortly followed suit. His index finger tapped his elbow and his brows remained furrowed in irritation. Erwin sighed.

“You don’t have to do this,” Levi said, his grey-blue eyes cutting through the taller man.

“It’s fine, I owe it to you,” Erwin conceded. They would not get very far in any regard if he was not honest, and it was not fair to expect something of Levi that he was refusing to do himself. And in these quarters, with the sun setting behind him, he found himself recounting the tale of his childhood, a tale he hadn’t told in years. He told of his father, a teacher, his own curiosity, and his father’s admissions that what was in the history books was most likely false. He admitted to his own foolishness, and his father’s resulting disappearance and “accidental” death. Levi’s eyes widened and he stilled as Erwin told his story.

“You think the government killed your father? And you joined the Survey Corps to discover the truth?” Levi asked after a brief silence.

“Yes, exactly.” The smaller man pursed his lips and his brows furrowed. Erwin raised an eyebrow as Levi fidgeted. “Do you know something, Levi?” The raven swallowed hard, debating how much he should divulge.

“I heard rumors… while I was in the Underground,” he confessed. 

“About my father?” the blond’s brows furrowed. Levi shook his head.

“About a squad dedicated to eliminating whoever the crown has deemed problematic… my mother said that’s why we were in there to begin with… to hide from the “bad people” who wanted to hurt us,” the raven explained.

“Did they..?”

“No, disease did,” Levi answered bluntly. The blond reached for the smaller man’s hand, which he gave, and they sat in silence for a while. 

“What do you already know?” Levi asked quietly, looking up into the blond’s eyes. Erwin swallowed hard and he took a deep breath. “It’s okay, I have an idea.”

“I know someone...hurt you, when you were small. An older man, by the name of Kenny,” Erwin stated cautiously.

“Is the name Kenny the Ripper familiar to you?” Erwin started to draw his hand away, but Levi tightened his grip as he spoke.

“Yes, but I thought that was just an urban legend.”

“It’s not. He raised me after my mother died,” Levi hesitated. In many ways he was humiliated by his past, feeling that these above-ground people all looked down on him. But Erwin had seen where he’d grown up, the city at least, first hand, and here they were. Now seemed to be as good a time as ever. 

“My mother was a prostitute, I never knew my father because he was one of her clients. She knew Kenny somehow, and he came to check on her after she had died, and found me. Let’s just say that with the scum that frequented the place, despite my mother’s efforts to protect me, I didn’t learn much about physical boundaries. And growing up with a serial killer had its fair share of shit too. You know the rest,” Levi tightened his grip on Erwin’s hand and looked away.

“I believe you,” Erwin started. “And nothing like that will happen to you again. If you have any worries please come to me and I will deal with it personally.” The raven looked back up and him and a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips.

“Thank you.”


End file.
